Emotional flood and labyrinth thinking
May 9, 2017
Two different sides, which never look at each other, form one single coin. Two opposite tip-ends, are the beginning and the end of one single stick. Two separate genders, supplement each other into one whole human being. Two opposite in charge energies form a single thunder… I need not go on!
All endless examples merge into the fact that we are dualistic beings, living in a dualistic surrounding. We get to hear about this a lot…Ying-Yang, the balance of the Force… we are acquainted to it, in both, myth and reality.
And even if: “This is the way that we perceive our world and there are other Universes to unveil…” Even so, one cannot ignore this reality for another, pretending that gravity or the pointy end of my sword, for instance, does not exist!
Dualism is a dance of two, which merge into one, and then separate again. It seems that, it is this exact motion, which keeps the world spinning.
If one observes his own functions, on any level, he can easily come up to the conclusion that, again, we are full of “dualities” which constantly come together and go apart, even within ourselves…
Two hemispheres that will form a single brain, two legs in order to take one stride, two hands cooperating for one task…
Our species is unique on this planet, because it evolved into a being which constantly is stretching all possible limitations…
We are self-conscious, not only in the sense that we understand the complete course of our lives from birth to death, but we are also conscious of our position among others and among our surroundings. And this extends in a much wider and larger scale beyond ourselves .We are tool-makers, machine builders and we can intervene even on our DNA structure. We adapt our environment to our comfort and liking…
Furthermore we are decision-makers, we think, we evaluate and then we choose: Shall we go here or shall we go there? Will we do this or will we do that?
We make positive decisions, like building a prosperous, beautiful city. And we make negative decisions, like totally destroying this city, by an act of war.
Usually decisions start from the singularity of an individual, who acts within the collectiveness of his fellow man.
So, in order to understand the duality within ourselves, let us start from one man, let us start from our own self…
How do we come down to a choice?! Any choice…
Again, this is done in a dualistic manner, by using two “qualities” which will form a single decision of choice. We use emotion and thought…
Emotion and thought
Emotion is primary based on instinct… and it is realized and expressed through our feelings. It is easy to understand, describe and analyze, since well before we climbed the ladder of evolution… we simply felt, just like all our fellow animals do.
We come to this world with our feelings as our only guide, and much like in our evolution, we learn to think much later on.
Don’t get me wrong here… any human will learn to think from early on in life (and especially teenagers, despite what is usually said, are exceptionally gifted in using their intelligence). But, the closer we are to our birth years, the more we do prefer to use our instinct.
Feelings and instinct are not highly respected in comparison to thinking… Nevertheless, the fact remains that this quality of ours brought us “as far”, and we should not forget how to use it and expand it…
Thought is a product of our intellect… and it is realized and expressed with our mind. It does set us apart from all other beings on this planet. It takes training and learning in order to achieve it. In contrast to emotions and feelings, thinking is not easy to explain, because there are many levels to it. All humans can feel a kick on their knee or a kind word. But simply “reacting” with your brain while walking around your life among other people, does not qualify as “thinking”. It goes much deeper than that…
There is a link, a connection, a symbiosis if you like, between those two qualities. Learning how to feed them, expand them, but most importantly how to balance them, is not something that we are taught in school.
We have to explore them ourselves…
From confusion to harmony
At the beginning of this text we saw a few examples of dualities, like the coin, the stick etc. It is always easy to see something which is in front of us, but it is difficult to see the tip of our own nose. When it comes to examining our own self, we seem to fail greatly, always in comparison to examining things which are outside ourselves.
Think about it! All our senses are turned towards the, outside from us, world. But our own mind lives in a dark corner of silence, and even the reflection of our own mirror is false!
That being said, I just remembered an anecdote which is appropriate to the occasion.
The instruction to meditation suggests meditating with our eyes closed…
So, the beginner Student asked the Master:
“Even with my eyes closed I am conscious at my gaze, my eyeballs are moving around as I sit here. Master, what is the correct position to rest my eyes upon, once my eyelids are shut?”
“Gaze at the tip of your nose…” Said the Master
To make a Zen story short… The student ended up with a squint, while looking at the wrong side of his nose tip!
(For those not into Meditation: The tip of the nose starts between the eyebrows and not where the nose ends!)
Emotion and Thought are like two forces within us which are rarely balanced and in harmony, as they should be…
To break this down a bit, three things go usually wrong here…
One, we have cultivated (or not!) one at the expense of the other…
Two, we manage to have those two sides at constant war, being emotional where we should be thoughtful and vice versa…
Three …please look again at the text’s title!
In case one: It is always easier to feel than think. But lack of thinking will bring us to decisions based on feelings, which almost always will bring shallow results in anything that we do, or even worse, it will never bring anything well planed ahead!
On the other hand, if we are rational to the point of excluding, isolating and “lobotomizing” our feelings in the name of “square” thought, then we will become like a machine which is programmed to work towards its own self destruction!
In case two: Feelings are to be enjoyed and expressed. And Thinking is to be made in depth and harvest its outcome.
The coin has two sides, but it does not argue with itself… Yet, we many times manage to struggle within our own self by being emotional where we should not, and by being thoughtful where it has no place.
In case three: …it is obvious that sometimes nothing works correctly!
Understanding how one has made a total knot of himself is the only way to learn how to untie it!
But I will be strong opinioned here, that this untying, is a personal solitary job, entirely! No “gurus” “psychoanalysts” “life coaches” “books” “seminars” etc.
Emotion is like water. Water is essential to life… The absence of water means death. But water can also drown you by becoming a flood. Then it can overwhelm you completely!
For example, in the face of severe danger you become scared, the feeling of fear feels like a flood. It rushes on to you leaving you with no breath. At such a point the last thing you will need to hear, is someone to tell the famous stupid phrase “don’t be afraid!”
It is only you who can ease the flood… or drown in it.
Thought is the epitome of who we are. Intelligent beings who guide their own destiny… But one can get lost in the dark corridors of thought. One can become trapped inside of his own labyrinth of thinking, in a constant repeated endless circle of no-way out!
Again, no one can jabber you out of this, by telling you which direction to take, and what to do…
It is your own footsteps that brought you there, so you must find your way back, exactly the way you came, in the first place… or remain lost.
Emotional flood and labyrinth thinking lead to a state of Confusion!
It is a suffering, a disease…
And there is no escaping from it, because it is not a danger from outside, it is the result of constant un-balanced state, within a person.
But who among us has not felt tormented in the sea of his own feelings? Who among us has not been held prisoner in the corridors of his own stuck thoughts?
In Aikido we learn about balance in a very unique way. We are taught to actually unite, both the physical and mental aspect of balance, in ways that one (who has not practiced the Art) cannot even begin to imagine… Therefore our obligation towards ourselves is double, in not allowing confusion to overtake us! And if it does, since we are only human, then regain it as fast, just as we are taught to do…
From time to time the student will appear, who correctly has sensed, that through this Art he/she can also learn to fight back his personal “demons” of inner confusion and disarray. And unless they are not using their situation as an excuse to “drag their feet” and are willing to do “the extra mile” I have seen them prosper far beyond their original intent…